Tag Archives: Sarcasm

Chubby and Lame

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So two things have happened. Two things that greatly disturb me. One. I have become chubby. Two. I have become lame. How did this happen you may wonder? Well the first one is quite simple. I have eaten too many … Continue reading

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Dear Pizza Hut

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Dear Pizza Hut, I am writing this letter to inform you that you in fact…suck as a company. Yes I’m sure your pizza is yummy (as a Celiac I have no way of knowing since you have steadfastedly ignored the … Continue reading

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Tip Your People, People

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          Ok, I realize times are tough and that tipping your servers might not be high on your priority list, but let me tell you how I feel about it. To the high school/freshmen college couple that … Continue reading

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Microsoft Excel and Rusty Scissors

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Dear Microsoft Excel:  Please make your spreadsheets more entertaining so that I no longer want to poke my eyeballs out with dull scissors.  Sincerely,  A bored to death user armed with rusty scissors.

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I love my mommy…

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Periodically throughout the work day I will E-mail my mother. I E-mail her about things I’ve read. What’s happening at work. Complaints. Snivels. Minor accomplishments. Smart ass comments. The usual. Well today I had not heard from her. Not once. … Continue reading

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Chomp Chomp Slap

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Sometimes, I wish I could bite people who piss me off. Or slap them. But I’d really rather bite them. What would the other person say? Nothing. They’d be shocked. It’s too bizarre of a scenario to have a comeback … Continue reading

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Nonsense

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Nonsense: a : words or language having no meaning or conveying no intelligible ideas b (1) : language, conduct, or an idea that is absurd or contrary to good sense (2) : an instance of absurd action And I love … Continue reading

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